Rough Day At The Office Dear
Hopefully most of you have now figured out that the “Kitchen Sink” category is where I get to blow off steam, whine, feel sorry for myself and maybe, just maybe, provide a little insight and or wisdom to your lives. I seriously doubt it but it’s worth a little finger peckin’.
Day before yesterday was probably the biggest high and low day I have experienced. I had worked my tail off for over 4 months to accomplish a dream of mine. It took all the courage I could muster up to even try. But I did, and succeeded through the first level of my goal. Then I worked my butt off some more, learned all I could in a short period of time about the challenges ahead, and low-and-behold, got passed level two. That’s when I started thinking for a moment, I might be able to pull this off, so I pushed myself even further and harder. I poured every ounce of my creativity, charisma, and experience that I had accumulated for over 55 years into the next project. Late nights, long days, frustration beyond belief, but it worked. After 4 months of truly giving it all I had I was notified I had made it. I did it!
I was about ready to jump through the ceiling and hug the weirdo man down the hall. I had proven to myself I still had it and that the world wanted what I had! What a feeling. There was just a little bit of housecleaning to do and contracts to sign before my dream would come true. That’s when the euphoria peaked and the depressing low started to rise. I opened up the contracts and quickly saw my life disappearing right before my eyes. Everything I had worked for in my entire career could be jeopardized if I signed these contracts. The reputation for being a good, honest, loving person for “most” of my life (I think) could be jeopardized and ruined in a flash.
Something I had dreamed about for a long time was there at my fingertips. All I had to do was sign on a few dotted lines and it would begin the next week. A new life, full of excitement, challenge, and maybe riches. What do I do? The first thing I did was go throw up. My stomach was killing me. Was I to succumb to fulfilling my own selfish dreams, or was I to, as corny as it seems, “Do The Right Thing“? Well, I am pleased to report that I ‘Did The Right Thing“, as painful as it was. I am now in the unusual place of feeling better about still being able to make good decisions and prove to myself that my character is still important. But I am mourning a little over the loss of a dream that was in my hands. Soemthing’s around the corner that will eradicate the mourning and self-pity. I just know it. And when it discloses itself, my conscience will be clean.
OK, I got it out and feel better now. Thanks for listening.
The Wounded But Not Broken Warrior